If it doesn't kills you, it can help you..

A person tends to know that they are lucky is by throughout the moment they were struck by numerous misfortune and still breath at the end of the day.

The tides has changed but the feelings of the shattered and wounded heart remained.  I doesn't want to turn back the time to know what I could change, I want to forward the time to know what will happen next and I can't wait for it to happen, regardless of whether it's suppose to be good or bad.  Keeping it too long for me in my heart would not be good to my heart, not even a bit.

Consider it the sort of optimism that I've always had in me, I don't regret with the choices I made in my life, and I don't even want to think about how much I should have not done something that turns out bad.  It's mistake that lets me learn from my wrong and it also allows me to improvise.  If I were to live a life without fall, I would be the happiest idiot rather than the saddest smarty.

"Why do we fall down; so that we can learn how to climb back up"

 I may be a positive person, but I rather attract more negative things to me (if you take it as science, you'll know that electrons are attracted to proton)  and so, I've started to consider myself as a strong proton and the misfortunes that happened on me are those electrons held up by a special nuclear force.  Unfortunate  events do happen to me quite often and although it might not be a fatal one but it's enough to mentally damage my heart.

I have the strength to pull it up against me but it is only about a matters of time before I entirely tripped and never woke up from the misery.  Take it on me that I've been thinking too much, but if I could be in a better place, I'll not be hurting my mind by doing this to myself.  I really wish that I could make things turn out better. 

"I don't believe in forever, especially those that will threaten the way I stand upon my life"

Where is the promised happiness?

"Tired me is as usual, aimlessly strolling around the lake, under a tree.  Crying, weak, tears flow like river, nobody is around."

- a Dream.

 

"Do you still remember the promised that you made on me, that you'll be there for me when no others will be?  When I'll be alone, you'll accompany me, when nobody will love me, you will.. I thought you were just one of the few good girl friends that I used to have.. but I was wrong, I fell for you eventually.. and then, that's where I found my kryptonite that weakens me.  Now, you're going on with your happy lives and I still belongs to the promised land that had never meant to exist."

- a Story

"Here I am, wanted to tell you so much that I've never forgot about you, I've never abandoned you, I've always been by your side but who am I to you now..?  Only a friend that you used to know, a friend who is far behind the closet that you don't even need anymore.  I tried to bring back the bonds, I didn't give up, I tried so hard, I even broke apart and my heart shattered into pieces when I saw how you perceived my value to you... I've attempted to go out with you but why would it be so hard for me to ask you out but it's so easy for the others to get you out? My timing wasn't wrong.. I made it right, but this also allows me to see who I am really to you?.."

- a Reality

  "Normal people will ask me to stop believing and to never fall for such person who will never look at you.  However, deep down in them, I know you know that falling in love with a people and knowingly you can't be with them but you insist to be there for them just to ensure they can be happier, even you can't hold their hands, and even you can't be old with them isn't easy at all.  You'll feel suffocated deep down inside, Love is not like a plug where you can unplug it to stop it.  You just need to keep believing in it and don't give up, but when you've started doubting about it, that's where you started to shattered deep down inside"

- a Believe

 "I don't expect you to remember anything about me, I don't expect you to know that I'll be fine and I don't expect you to care about me.  Just be there to let me love you, but this belief is about to collapse..  but it's okay, it's okay.  Where ever you will be in the near future, I hoped you'll remember, that there was once a man who promised to always be there for you and he will hold it till you've forgot about him." 

- a Promise