Lost and Found

Talking about losing something, I'm very certain we all have lost something in our life and found something else to regain what had been lost..  Somehow, is everything that we had lost can be found back and remain the usual way it used to be?

Through this recent time, I've lost a lot of things I had around me.  It just *poof-ed* and disappeared.. just like that... yeah, just as simple as that.  Though sometimes, the term of "lost" doesn't mean it has gone forever, it's still there, you can still see it, and you can still feel it.. but it's all different, things has changed.  Even if you could bring it back to you, even if you could pretend as if nothing ever happened, does the same feel remain pure?

"Let bygones be bygones", that's what I heard of what people usually said.  Was it really that easy to let go of something that doesn't belong to you?  You know you can't bring it back with you.  You know "it" deserves something better and yet you want to be by "it"'s side to protect it.  It's stupid, pointless, and suicide.  Yet you've insisted to hold up to "it"... until "it" disappears right in front of you and everything else around you suddenly became meaningless and dull.

At least this short few years, my life became colourful and I had a reason to stay strong to stand against my heavy odds...  However, some things can't remain forever isn't it.. Even if you've forged your heart to remain for "it", "it" will still leave you for no apparent reason.

Life is not a movie, things just happened for no reason, no one can explain and nobody can tell you why did it happened.  They will just be able to tell you to "Move on".  Years of journey together, does memories really disappeared that easily?  It's always easier to let go of me... So is the past...

Whether it was me who have decided to remove it or it was "it" that decided to let go...  I'm already at the helpless edge and there's nothing I could do anymore.  I've tried on holding it back but I realised, it wasn't me who's not trying... but "it" fell off the edge...

Blame it on fate or my karma, I don't know whether all this have been decided or else my beforelife might have been a bitch and now karma strikes this present.  Just how long do I have to keep losing things that I cared for in this life...? Just how much shall I lose until I can finally win back?