P/S - I'm lost in blue again, I just need to see that... that very smile again...
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Mirror With Broken Simper
P/S - I'm lost in blue again, I just need to see that... that very smile again...
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Abandon All Hope
Do I never learn to help myself when myself is in need...?
I'm too harden that I never wanted to get help.
Someone is willing to lay their hand but... it's not the hand I want to hold.
I'm full of greed and eclectic.
And look where I ended up of being....
All
Alone
Hectically.
Abandon
All
Hope.
I know I'm not alone here being alone... I just...same like anyone would be...just tired..
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
CTRL+ALT+DEL
I've been acting much more weird these days, I realised it.. I've frighten everyone around me..
I'm not sure what I'm becoming either... This... This darn feeling...
I just can't stop hating myself these days..I don't know what I wanted...
Love?
Study?
Friends?
Families?
The more I think about it, the more ridiculous it get.
That's why, I'm going to put everything to a full stop. Stop the growth of myself... Fight for what I have...
Love can wait I guess... Sad but true... WAIT!!!
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Are you ready?
"Why you always keep problems in your heart?"
The rather quite same thing my housemate Weixiang asked me...
Some times, I know I do seems like having a lot of problems in my life and I tend to keep it all..
Maybe some of you might think it's because I'm trying to stay away from you all or I'm being selfish for not telling out my problems. Somehow, that's not it...
When I always felt like telling my problems out to one trusted person...
I recalled what "she" had said to me when I told "her" my problem...
"Even if you tell me, I can't do anything to help you"
It's the sentence that put me to a helpless thought...
"She" was right in some sense...
But I do things different, I wanted to be always here, to listen to anyone's problems, though I might not be helpful, I'll try what's possible, though I'm not good in advising but I ain't letting anyone important to me to be sad.
That's me~ ¿LUNatism?
Friday, October 23, 2009
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Sad is sad... it's still.. pathetic..
It might sound shocking for some of you, but then I've predicted this will happen and kept my fake hope underneath my brain for the "just in case" but truth is truth... I sucks in the first sem...
Like they say, "The first will always be the hardest". Alright, I've sipped the taste of college life, it's time to stay focus, if before this I did focus, now.. I should Focus more!!
Results:
Microeconomics : B+ (DARN!! I was expecting A!!)
Hubungan Etnik : B+ (Same sad case.....A!!!!!!)
English : B+ (My teacher is telling the truth, it's almost impossible to A...)
Introduction to Accounting : D (Expected sucks....)
Quantitative Studies : D (Hoped for pass... but still~)
Well...well... well.... What can I say... it's not over yet...
I shall put more effort to find my Beloved one... if not, I won't have the inspiration to study hard...(sounds like excuse... or maybe it's exactly an excuse..) Well, I just hate lonely~!!
Be wise in study, think twice for love~!
Monday, October 19, 2009
Everything is SPINNING
I need something, someone, anything, or anyone to kill my boredom please~!!
I'm trying my best finishing all the works, then all that left for me...
Rot~ T-T If only I could get the right timing to go out.... sigh~~~ When I ok, other's not ok, when I not ok, everyone's ok... LoL Clashes of luck, nevermind, I'll continue to wait.....
WAIT~~~~~~
T-T
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Friday, October 16, 2009
A tale in Starbucks Coffee
So, I hope this will be helpful to you, sifu (JJ~) xD
I took a step by another step walking to my destination, in my mind, I’ve setup my whole purpose and there’s no nothing that could stop me from travelling this path. This whole thing was like a journey to me, I knew a lot about this place and it’s under my understanding that this destination had been part of my haven already. I stood up in front of this Café and took a look at the lively greenery coloured logo which bears the soothing sensation that roams around it.
Somehow, something is making me hesitating of entering this haven, is it because that my heart is not ready for this surprise of joy? Or it is because I’m overexcited that this will be another moment for me to gleam every single moment I have stayed in there? Any other way, I’m not going to let this slight hesitation blocks away my whole effort of walking out from my home sweet home of this far just to pass by this Café without leaving a remnants of memory in there. That’s why; I’m making my way into that Café. The first thing of all that menus I had been looking on doesn’t seems really matters to me because my eyes had been highlighting on that item on the menus that is none other than the Caramel Frappuccino or should said that I’ve been longing and having a high expectation over it that even before I take a good look at the menu, I could already smell out the scent of the sweet divine.
There’s a moment of pause that I passed by the cold glasses of machine that holds many miracles inside it, yes, all the wonderful mouth-watering desserts are hidden within it and I couldn’t even imagine that I’m just a few centimeters away from all of it and they are shielded by just a slide of glass away from me. I controlled my drools and further making my steps to the counter. As the waitress was smiling at me and asking me the usual routine what-would-you-like questions, all I could see is her mouth moving and slight echoes entering my ears. As I’m not going to blurred out again, I made my wish that cost me not less than RM15.
I took my lovely made ice blended Caramel Frappuccino and have a sit on the corner of the Café. As soon as I have a sit on the warm cushion, the smooth classical music entertained my body and it was a feeling like no others can give it to me. I was so into the music as if I’m being drowned in joy, and without much more of thinking, I opened my bag and took out all my stationeries and any other necessary things that I’ll need to create my fantastic legacy of environments for my assignments in this very place.
From the very beginning, I knew it that this will be the place my ideas and inspiration doing the dance around in my mind. This is the best place like no other place could grant me the rehabilitation for me. It’s like a haven meant to exist for me to create a small paradise through my arts. Each time when I’m in need, I’ll just take the sip of the ice shards in the cup and let the wondrous scent of caffeine reach my tongue and deliver the grand sensation to my brain, it’s enhancing and giving me the morale to move on for each sip I took through the symbolic green-coloured straw. This place really does makes it all for me and that logo of it will always stay remarked in my heart though some other people might not see or feel what I feel in this place, somehow, it’s the measure of satisfaction I could have here that matters. The name of this place is none other than the angelic beautiful carved name on the signboards; Starbucks Coffee.
P/S- I think the effect looks better if you put the picture at the bottom part, because this will make it looks more suspending xD
DBU Group 15 on the MOVE
Like what Kanex(our class rep) told us that our class had been rather "cold" these days due to less communication, all we do in class just stays in the class as it would be. We rather not express ourselves at outside, so, here we try to make it possible to have fun together.
Made a plan > Discuss > Choice > Make it possible
Though as expected, not many of them could make it, well, what to do, most of them are from other state, they'll prefer to back to their home sweet home.
Luckily, some of them are still willing to stay after all.
Had fun in the karaoke and they thought I couldn't sing?
Told you already, don't guess me, I'm not what I look like ahahahaha.
I admit I sing it wrongly, well who cares? I pay to sing and you expect me to stay behind there drinking and watching you all sing?? That's not Deelun's way kekeke~!!
One of the best part that is, I sang "Stayin' Alive" and "Boom Boom Pow", they couldn't catch the fast rhythm but I did kyahahahahaha.
Too bad there's no Naitomea songs in there, else, I'm singing it on the spot already T-T
Later on, travel to Times Square to watch this Totally-Lame movie entitled Chaw (Man-eating Boars...Pig...). Due to many clashes of ideas... So, we just simply picked a movie and enter the cinema at once. I wasn't giving any good expectation for this show at all. This was the first movie ever that I've walked out of it to go toilet because normally I'll just hold it but I really can't take it anymore and rather concede to nature's call.
Anyway, at the end of the day, it's still fun hanging out with them ahahaha~ It's better than just leaving everything dull from beginning till end right, We'll be classmates for 2 years if everything is possible after all~
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
The Story of a LiL GirL (Dedicated to JJ)
Kekekeke, JJ please don't hit me (*piak piak* aiyak~) xD, #It's not me who captured the photo k~!!#
Ladies and men~ yeap, this is the lady that I'm talking about.
Her name is Joe Jian,Lee, one of the person who's in '91 that is older than me kekeke.
Based on her uniform, I could shorten the story that she's my camps-mate~
Alright, here's the picture that I'm suppose to describe a'ight.
*Here goes*
There's many thing to be told according to this picture of this lady, when people says that one pictures shows thousand words, from what I can see of this lady through my eyes, she have more than a thousand words to be describe. Rather than me spitting out every single words of it, it’s better to summarize it all once and for all.
No need for formality of how I should derive, and I need not to know others' opinion of what they can see through the picture of her because all I can tell out that is, she's been through a huge changes ever seen we waved our goodbye at 11th March '09. Once she was a girl with spectacles that makes me tagged her as a nerdy person as she used to roam around with a book by her side. Somehow, like what people always said, never judge a book by its cover, she was far and much further from being a nerd. A girl who can smile through hard days even though, there are sometimes she get real tired and wondered about life. It's undeniable that the days dwelling at the National Service camp is not easy at all but it's because there's someone like Joe Jian that bring about changes, she shows the spirits for people to move on, she incurred the charisma to tell the others everything is going to be fine, and she bears the enthusiasm to see the days of camp to fade on.
She's absolutely right when it comes to this matter, there's no point of giving up everything you had just because you're in a situation that you disliked, and we can't get everything we want in our life just exactly how we hoped for it. Effort is needed to earn wings of good results and this is part of her great personality. She gave surprises to those who don’t know her well she got me startled most of the times when I knew her the first few weeks. Joe Jian managed to be the reason why some of us need to live on this life with purpose and to never let it waver because that's the way she do things the way it should be. Some people would say that she's a stubborn person for she hardly concedes to life, but some will see her as a fighter in life.
Although, there are no such things as perfect personality that exists in life, she does have some flaw in herself but it's never inadequate to have some glitch. People do make mistakes throughout their life, somehow, what matters the most that is the willingness of them to make a change through it. Joe Jian do hope that some time she could just be as free as others to break the law and hug herself to abandon every responsibility she bears just like some of them who's oblivious towards their trustworthiness, but she's just different, she's just meant to be someone who can prove righteous. It's because of this so-called burden that she needs to bear that makes her who she is of today. Just like the light that shines through the darkness with brimming radiance.
P/S - JJ, there's 535 words in this essay, well, there's no doubt I'm sure that you'll need to alter this disquistion, it might sounded too normal and not eye-catching. Well, I just write out what I have in mind about you. So, if there's any weird mistakes or you find it out that this is not the aspect you've wanted, feel free to tell me bout it a'ight. Because I'm also trying to learn to do descriptive essays and I'm not sure whether am I running out from the topics, it's my first time doing this kind of essays after all, so, your comment would be appreciated alright~ xD
Monday, October 12, 2009
Blind Romance?
Let Time Lead Me for I shall never Surrender.
Let Pain be my strength because I'll never give in.
Certainly, Undoubtedly, I guess this feelings can be told someday,
If I save you and you save me and if everything come true,
There would not be anything to be regret, right?
Certainly, undoubtedly, till that moment, I will be healed by you.
A reason for an act...
Somehow, today I did have an interesting chatting with my friends at College.
Kekekeke, talked bout 2012~
Some(Most) of them seems to get really worried about the end of the world..
Well, I tend to ask myself "Am I trying to act as if I'm not scared at all while my heart is shrinking when I know the world is coming to an end??".
Sometimes, some people just want to show others that they are brave but they are just couldn't bare to lose to themselves in their heart (not referring to anyone..).
Somehow... I know it clearly myself that I'm really preparing for what's going to happen on me myself.
Jeffrey(classmates) said he was not ready for all this, still young, many things to do, get married, spread legacy and doing many more. Things that people would like to lead through their life, infinite happiness.
Not to say I doesn't want those days, who doesn't pray for that every single day??
However, if things are meant to happen, it will happen no matter what, isn't it?
Truth is always cruel, Reality is always unrealistic.
I really didn't think of how this world will end.. Maybe because I have faith that I'll live through it? I just believe it..
Like I say, Live your life to the fullest every single day and Cherish it. The next days will be no regrets.
I guess all that left for me, is to pour my love and watch it grow and me myself grow along with it.
Because I'm looking for the chance to spread my legacy too after all~!!
P/S- Live well everyone, Whether time is running out or not, Let's live our lives to the fullest alright!!
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Time to burn the fats!!
Well, since I'm not that tired (why not~?). So, straight away head to the gym with the guys and amazed by those utilities at the gym there..(never been to gym before after all).
I just do some jogs, cycling stuff, weighing steels and some other stuff... Just to realise after a while, my sweat bath my clothes...
Just similar to a hippopotamus.
Anyway, I'll just try to do more and get fit.
Since now so "Shuai" already with my hair getting longer~ I wouldn't mind to get my body shape look better Kyahahahahaha~
P/S - don't vomit blood, I'm doing self-"an wei"~ T-T
Monday, October 5, 2009
Undeniable Facts about me...
I was so wise when I was driving that I keep my speed at legal range because I scared I'll miss out the road. So, first mistake, I missed out a left turn and I was lead to nowhere and I turn and turn until I met a tunnel.. a damn long tunnel with the speedtrap warnings(60km/h). The sad things that is, I'm the only noob who maintained at the 60km/h.... other cars just zoom off infront of me and I'm so damn assure they are at 100+km/h....and there was even this mercedes who flashed at me while i was remaining at the 60km/h pace... I don't even know should I speed off like them or not, I just signaled myself away at once and keep the speed at that same limit..
1, 2, 3, 4,5,6,7,8,9+++ cars by cars passed by me with damn high speed... I was totally speechless..
Then, move out from the tunnel, Turn turn turn turn to nowhere...
Finally turn back out and enter back the route I missed(phew~~) then I just keep follow the Jalan Kuching signboard.. I remember my father told me that as long I follow Jalan Kuching, I could safely reach my place. So, I keep follow...(along with the pathetic traffic jam)... Suddenly, the Jalan Kuching sign gone to nowhere when I met the signboard... there's road to bridge and under the bridge... I was blanked... No more Kuching... (perhaps Anjing?!).. I just drove above the bridge without second thought.. then when I peek on the road under the bridge.. I saw the signboard [To Left : Jalan Tunku Abdul Rahman] I remembered I had my head hard banged on the steering.
Soon enough, the wrong road I used lead me to Genting Highlands road... Once I saw Batu Caves...I confirmed something is going totally damn WRONG!!!!
So, I get my assist, My father, called him (my phone left 3 bars of battery...). Later on, my father lead me to Ampang and then I made a few more crazy turns... finally saw the [Straight: KTAR]. I eventually speed up at the greenlight of the traffic and then this crazy motor from nowhere turn to the right and I was aware if I was any faster, I'll be seeing a flying human infront of me.
Lucky me, nothing happened... I followed the KTAR sign... till one moment... and again.. The KTAR sign just disappear on the next few signboards... Damn SPEECHLESS....
Somehow, luck still smiling on me... I saw wangsa Maju signboards.. I knew I'm near already.. turn turn turn turn....
Got a split road again... Wangsa Maju 2 & Wangsa Maju 4... (WTF?!) I always thought Wangsa Maju is only a single one... Since when got ver. 2 and ver.4?? without hesitation again, I turned the Wangsa Maju 4.. Thank goodness, I was in the right road this time...
Fuyooo... Saw the LRT station really happy because I knew it was the right place already...
My evil grin appeared~ Vah la~ Reached destination safely at Melati Utama~~
In the nutshell, this whole crazy driving acts ate me.....
3 1/2 DAMN HOURS~!!!!!!!!!
While my father usually only took 1/2 hours to get me there...
Can see the difference ya?
Not enough?
I had a full fuel tank when I leave home...
Reach there... The fuel tank was just left 3/5....
Any other way, thank goodness that I'm safe and sound~ ahaks~!...
P/S- Next problem... how long would I need to get back to Shah Alam........ T-T
Friday, October 2, 2009
Moments of Kedah
As some of you know, I've been to Kedah last few days for a few days.
Well surey~ I had fun at there, though the place we been through is not that much, but it's because my friends are around, I could turn the table round and make a mess.. be it silly or stupid or smartass, make fuss or crazy acts, as long it's safe and can make laugh~ we all will cheer and treasure the seconds we're there.
Like what I always said, time is sufficient.. I'm not going to waste it for nothing.
Thanks everyone!!